Wednesday, 19 March 2008


Ah Wolverhampton!

No, not the most unsuccessful musical ever produced - but the phrase I utter every time I walk from the station into the town of my birth and marvel at the complete bizarreness of the place. It strikes me that everyone in Wolverhampton is either engaged in an argument, or is telling someone aggressively about an argument they were recently having. It really is a place of wonderment and I encourage all to take a gander.

Though I felt I'd found a suitable cardigan (see previous posts) - I felt I had to have a quick trawl around the charity shops - just in case. They were surprisingly void of upsetting cardies. Very odd, as it says on the sign you pass as you're driving in: "Wolverhampton - Home of the Upsetting Cardigan"

I saw some at the market which were exactly what I was looking for - but they were £12. £12! And the lady tried to sell me other things with a certain amount of aggression.

'We also have these jumpers' She said, holding up a completely unsuitable jumper - something a lower league Estate Agent would wear on a causal Sunday. I ran.

The market had one of those meat vans, where the man sells his butchery out the back and had a microphone and PA system to drum up business. Even though there was absolutely no one anywhere near him, bar one old lady buying chops, he still chose to speak into the microphone while conducting his business.

'Yeah, that’s a lovely cut that. Take a look at it' He bellowed across a large distance.
The woman's reply couldn't be heard.
'Do you need any sausages, because I've got some lovely ones over here' He screamed, his voice travelling at least a quarter of a mile even though his customer was ONE FOOT AWAY.

I wondered if it was some showbiz bug that had gripped him and now he couldn't function without shouting into a microphone. Personally, I would never dream of conducting a transaction with an individual using an amplification device. That is just an individual preference.

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